There is a stranger, who comes to this village from the sea. Brings fish in the winter when people are hungry. Comes on the King tide. Or the Queen tide, if the King tide’s booked out. That was last night. You are mistaken.
We have never heard of this man. Hey, Aquaman! Thanks for bringing all that
fish last night on the King tide. You legend! Oh, and if you’re taking requests for next time, is lobster out of the question? I hate this village. I believe that an enemy is coming, from far away. How come none of you guys showed up
for me mom’s funeral but when Hagrid’s stupid shield gets dented,
you’re out in force! Silence! I’m looking for warriors. And alcoholics with excessive body art. He said he’ll fight with us? More or less. He said no. Didn’t he? What gave you that impression? Barry Allen. Bruce Wayne. Look man, I don’t know who you are,
but whoever you’re looking for… Oh, hey. You must be a friend of Ba– OH MY GOD! What happened to my twin brother,
whose name is also Barry but was never blessed with superhuman powers??? Uhhhh.. I’m sorry to have to tell you… Your brother was a terrorist. Yep. That’s both legs broken. No deal! Mmm. Not again! I heard about you. Didn’t think you were real. I’m real when it’s useful. Well… Is it useful now? Hmmm… NAH! Wh– Batman? Where’d you go? Cyborg? Who are you talking to? Does not compute. Arthur Curry. I hear you can talk to fish. That’s ridiculous. I do not talk to fish. Oh, I see how it is. “Bros before Nemos”. [WONDER WOMAN]
So Batman, who exactly is this enemy
coming from far away? [BATMAN]
He’s this guy who used to pick on me in school. Real mean kid. Anyway, I heard he’s moving back to Gotham,
so I figured– [FLASH]
Wait. He’s just a kid who picked on you?? [BATMAN]
Well he’s not a kid anymore. He’s my age. And if it weren’t for the accident,
he’d be similar build too. [AQUAMAN]
What accident? [BATMAN]
Oh, he… He lost both his legs to frostbite
on a World Vision assignment to Nepal. – But none of that’s relevant to–
– Stop. [WONDER WOMAN]
You assembled the world’s greatest superheroes to beat up a middle-aged charity worker in a wheelchair? [BATMAN]
No, no… ! J– Your phrasing is prejudicial. He kissed Claire Buckton in third grade when he knew I had a big thing for her! [AQUAMAN]
“Justice League”? More like “Long-term Grudge League”. I’m going back to the ocean.
Aquaman, no! [CYBORG]
Yeah, I’m going back to Cyberdyne. [BATMAN]
Oh, come on– Cyborg! [JET NOISE] Flash! Don’t you leave too! [FLASH]
I left a few seconds ago.
This is just a residual image. [BATMAN]
What? NO! Wonder Woman, come on! Don’t break up the band! [WONDER WOMAN]
Sorry, Bruce. I’m going back to my home: An island paradise entirely populated by
super-fit women in miniskirts. Oh. Well then I should probably go with you,
you know, as your protect– That’s not happening. GUH!!!
This is grade three all over again!